"I hereby declare, on oath, that I absolutely and entirely renounce and abjure all allegiance and fidelity to any foreign prince, potentate, state, or sovereignty of whom or which I have heretofore been a subject or citizen; that I will support and defend the Constitution and laws of the United States of America against all enemies, foreign and domestic unless those laws are ridiculous, offensive, "unconstitutional," hateful/spiteful, pointless, unfair, or infringe on these so-called "unalienable" rights that have been promised to American citizens, let alone those Constitutional rights promised to all human beings on American soil; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same Meh; that I will bear arms on behalf of the United States when required by the law Fuck that. I'm moving to Canada should they ever try to draft me.; that I will perform noncombatant service in the Armed Forces of the United States when required by the law NO ARMY SHALL EVER HAVE ME!; that I will perform work of national importance under civilian direction when required by the law ...like.... what, exactly??; and that I take this obligation freely without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion because if I don't, I'll get kicked out of the country & I won't be able to go back to my home country & will be forced to wander international waters forever... with Captain Jack Sparrow! <3; so help me God. Separation of Church & State, dude. FSM/Buddha/Allah is not amused."
Uh-huh... And this little spiel is followed by the Pledge of Allegiance. So you see, I fail horribly at being "American" by these standards XD So sad...
Yea, yea, I'm going to bed. Eventually. [yawn] I think I just need more HoYay.
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